When I started reading this book I knew what was I getting myself into only by number of pages. yep 1700 pages.... I mean WTF?! But I read them all. I did skim in the beginning because their childhood was stretched for 30% and I was bored as hell during that part but then... then I got hooked when the CRAZY began.Do you have any idea how I feel about this book?!I HATE THIS BOOK!I HATE EVERYTHING ABOUT IT! I HATE ALL THE CHARACTERS!I HATE HIM! I HATE HER! I HATE THIS F*CKING STORY! I HATE THE WRITING! I HATE IT ALL WITH ALL MY BONES!AND I HATE THAT I LOVE IT SO F*CKING MUCH!!!!!♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥I was pretty much pissed 100% of the book.... yep... I don't think there was a moment when I wasn't pissed... pretty much everything pissed me of.They said LOVE made them do all that stuff, LOVE made them what they became... LOVE LOVE LOVE....well I can tell you that HATE made me write this, HATE will make me buy this book if it ever goes published in paperback just so I can torn it piece by piece and then burn it with smile on my face! HATE made me scream how f*cking stupid they are.HATE whispers to me that he is selfish prick, that he is asshole, that he is spoiled brat, that he is junkie only thinking about himself.HATE whispers to me that she is the biggest idiot I ever read about, that she is spineless, stupid, so weak that she forgave EVERYTHING!HATE whispers to me until I scream, scream, scream....My heart didn't flip, flip, flutter.... my heart screamed, screamed, bloody screamed with rage!My pulse, pulse, pulsing heart wanted kill, kill, killing-time! This isn't LOVE... this is obsession and holding onto something that destroys you second by second for 9 years.My heart whispers to me that I love them, that I should stop denying myself...but my brain pushes heart's whispering out...Does my writing style pisses you of?!? Annoys the shit out of you?!?!WELL IMAGINE 1700 PAGES OF THAT ANNOYING SHIT!Imagine hating something with all you got and then imagine how much can that annoy you because you end up loving it so much.I wanted non HEA because they don't deserve any type of HEA! They deserve mental institution!But this ending!? OOH GOOOOD!!!!! My rage keeps boil, boil, boiling up! It will only calm when I burn the paperback....To all you BEAUTIFUL DISASTER non-fans that hated the book without reading it... I dare you all to read this and then comeback and tell me that BD was over the top.... you have no idea what a piece of cookie that was comparing to this.... I dare you to read this and then say that BD isn't right for molding young brains.... you have no bloody idea how BD is child story compared to this fan fiction of TWILIGHT....