I have heard so much about this book and I always put it aside for one fine day, but that day came early because I was "molested" by several GR friends to finally read it :D
I never read the blurb, but I read lots of reviews of my GR friends and all of them were high rated (mostly 5 stars).
The reason I was "afraid" to read it was one character - Thomas - because I was afraid he would remind me of one other character which I seriously didn't like and annoyed me.
You know that "pressure" when you know you have to read something and immediately backs you of the book... well I think that was the reason why I had a rocky start with it. I seriously thought about not finishing it, but I decided to take a break and catch up later. Honestly I am glad I didn't give up.
At first I did like it, especially when I read Marcus POV, but later it all went down for me. The reason it all went down for me were the club scenes. Don't get me wrong, I was not disturbed or anything by reading it, not even happy or aroused or some other emotion, I was simply indifferent and actually didn't have the joy of turning and reading next pages. Maybe that sounds a little weird but that was how I really felt.
Everything except that part I really enjoyed, the rest of the book I really loved.
I thought I would love Marcus POV more but it turned up that the only reason I finished this book was actually Thomas - the character I was dreading to read about. Funny, I know :D
I won't write about the story because there are dozens of reviews that will make you read the book as soon as possible, so I will only write how I felt about it in the end.
The whole idea of the story was really excellent, I think that is one of the most beautiful love stories I ever read. I always love to read about that struggle with feelings, with decisions you make, with fears of your actions and in this story you have it on basicly every page.
The writing was simply amazing! I think that I never read so many breathtaking sentences in one book ever! I was literally mesmerized how beautiful it was written.
But through the first half of the book I had some issues. At first I didn't like Thomas that much, then I loved Marcus, then I loved Marcus with his POV, then I hated Marcus in Thomas POV, then I loved Thomas, then I hated Marcus in his POV etc. etc. etc.
It was pretty frustrated for me to read it, but then at the second half of the book it all changed. I believe the moment where it all changed for me was the moment when Thomas beat those assholes for hurting Marcus.
So here is what I think why was that moment essential for me to really start devouring the book - because I have mental issues and have to read about ALPHA gays, and even though Thomas was a submissive I kinda couldn't help but feel that deep down he has that beautiful, little, possessive, alpha feature even if it shows up only when protecting Marcus.
When it comes to characters I loved them and hated them, it really depended upon the chapter. I loved Thomas but hated his constant analyzing. I loved how he saw the things around him, and the things he valued. When it comes to Marcus I hated how he didn't want to say anything about him. And I usually hate that in any book... But I loved how he surrendered to Thomas in the end, and with him being a dom, made it more beautiful.
So when it comes to the story I would have rated it 4 stars, but in the end when I reread some of the quotes I highlighted I will give it a 5 star just because the writing was seriously amazing.
The quotes that I loved the most were this:
“I’ve never gotten in, so how the hell can I get out?” Thomas snarled. “You want me to be your family? You let family in. Knowing they’ll hurt you, you do it anyway, because that’s what love is. You let them in to hurt you, love you—”
“But what I’ve realized is that you’re the true problem. What you feel you deserve, the faith you have in us. The question isn’t do I belong in this world of yours, but do you want me to belong in it?”
“That’s when I decided not to be afraid of anything. Then you came and I remembered that true fear is knowing you have something you can’t bear losing.”
“You understand the darkness without ever having been in it. You see the world as it is, all its misery and pain, all the beauty that somehow rises above it, and you accept all of it. You accept me.”
So there Blacky and Shelly B, I told you not to be afraid of my review :D